Silence, Bliss, and then every thought in the Universe

Meditative Frogs

A meditation student went to his guru and said, 'Every time I sit down to meditate, my mind goes crazy and I can't calm down.  My mind wanders and it does not seem to be doing any good.'

The guru responds, 'Don't worry, just wait two weeks.'

Two weeks later, the student comes back in and is soooooo excited and exclaims, 'My mind is calm.  I'm finding bliss and peace every time I meditate.  This is the greatest thing ever.'

The guru calmly replies, 'Don't worry, just wait two weeks.'

My meditation challenge has been exactly like this.  It goes in ebbs and flows and brick walls and stops.

I've practiced many different forms of meditation since January 1st.  Guided meditation, Zazen meditation, moving meditation, sleep inducing meditation, and holy crap has it only been 5 minutes mediation.

I've learned to let my mood and day choose my meditation style for the day.  If I have an idea of what I want to do and force it on my practice that day, I WILL STRUGGLE.  As I prep for my meditation, turning off my phone, etc.,  I ask myself, 'What is going to work today?'

So, Lesson #1 of meditation,
Let it flow.  Do not force it.

People have been asking me how long I meditate....  The answer is a bit complicated.  It varies.  Some days I'll meditate for almost an hour, the next 10 minutes.  The goal is to meditate with full intention, not time.  The Zen meditation practice of Zazen is very structured and regimented.  You sit for a specific time in a specific posture.  I have done this style, but I started rebelling against the time restrictions.  For 25 minutes, I would be in bliss and peace and then I would feel like my meditation was complete, but I would still have 25 minutes left in the time.  I would then sit in frustration and lose what I had gained.

Lesson #2 of meditation.
Be flexible on time.  Listen to your body and mind.  However, challenge yourself every once in a while and do a longer timed meditation.

My New Year's Resolution was to meditate every day.  By a bit of luck, I put no other conditions on it, like time or style, which is not normally my style.  I have missed a few days, but not a lot.  Ironically, it's on the quiet days, that I have a tendency to miss.  On crazy, busy, hectic, stressful days, I crave my meditation.

Lesson #3 of meditation.
Make a habit of it.  Consistency is the key to this....  You'll survive the brick walls and stops, if you just keep meditating.

The best part of my meditation  has not occurred during my practice.  It has occured in the rest of my life.  My critical inner voice is calming down--you know the one that says you can't do this.....  During exercise, I am able to find that quiet space in my mind and just let my body do what I set out to do.  I am also sleeping better.  And on those nights that I'm not sleeping well, I do a guided meditation that sends me right to sleep.

So, the final Lesson of meditation.  #4

Enjoy the results.  Enjoy the silence and bliss.....
just Enjoy.

Since I've started this, friends and family have been sending me quotes and cartoons about meditation, so I will leave you will this final thought.

If you do not have time to sit in silence for 30 minutes,
you need an hour.

Namaste,
Melissa

Humphrey, the Ham.....

This is Humphrey.....

You've met him a couple of times before here on the blog:  here, and here, and even in the one where his sister wrote, but he's never had a post dedicated to just him.

So, today is Humphrey's day here at A Little to the Left.

A little background information about Humphrey.

His full name is Sir Humphrey Dyson Murphy, aka Boo.

I got him at a Petsmart Super Adoption.  He was on the last row and the last cage and when I saw him, he walked over to the edge of his cage and looked up at me and said, "I'm yours."  I had no intention of getting another Basset Hound that day....  I went looking for any type of dog, but a Basset.  I was still getting over the death of my previous Basset Hounds, Tobie and Daisie, and did not think I could take another one.  Humphrey changed that idea and came home with me that day.

When I got home, I realized this full grown 70 pound dog had no leash training and was terrified of almost everyone and rapidly had separation anxiety anytime he was left alone.  The leash training took a couple of weeks of long walks, giving him a stick to carry so he wouldn't bite his leash, and a lot of patience.  The fear took quite a bit longer and a lot more help.  Humphrey was about 2 or 3 when I got him, and was (and I still believe) a handsome hound dog.  He's a big guy,  but not fat, just long and dopey looking.  People along the routes of his walks in the early days would want to talk to him, but he was just too scared and shy, but there were a few dedicated dog lovers who took the time to earn his trust.  Humphrey soon realized that in addition to me and the family, most of the world is very nice to dogs and he did not have to be so scared.

Humphrey still has a few quirks from his early abuse and lack of socialization, but has become an amazing dog.  He's a little more protective in the house than I would prefer but is easily disciplined.

Why did I explain all of his?

To show the growth and love this dog now has for people and the belly rubs they give out and the joy I feel when......

Humphrey, the Ham shows up.

You see it on walks when he sees kids, who are the most likely to pet, and he puts his tail up and his ears out to look very handsome.

But it really comes to life on a couple of events a year.
1.  The St. Patrick's Day Parade in Salt Lake City, when the Utah Friends of Basset Hounds (the Basset rescue group I now belong to) has an entry in the parade, which we call the Wasatch Waddle.  Humphrey spends the entire parade route on the edge getting tickles and pets from anyone who will give him one.

This photo is from a couple of years ago, but you get the idea.  Notice how he rolls over to get his belly rubbed.  I call him a 'BellySlut.'

2.  The Easter Bone Hunt at Wheeler Farm.  While this is more a dog event, Humphrey always seems to find people to pet him and basically make a big deal about him.

By the end of the event, I joke that Humphrey had a fan club and they were his 'peeps'.

3.  Strut Your Mutt....  I don't know what it is, but Basset Hounds seem to draw a lot of attention at events, and Strut Your Mutt is no exception.

Here is is taking a break in between all of his 'peeps' and pets.

4.  Walk, Wag and Swim.   This is a great event!!!!  The Saturday after Labor Day, the Draper pool is open to dogs.  Humphrey loves to swim and his people are there.  Could there be anything better?

If you are wondering about Bacall, she tolerates all of these events.  She loves her family, but other people are a bit suspect.  I always tell the people who she lets pet her that they have a special touch.  Dogs, however, she'll say hi to and play with.  She always makes sure Humphrey is in her sight, but stays off to the edge and let's him have the spotlight.

If you're out and about and see Humphrey, please feel free to give him a pet.  He'll probably sit on your feet to keep you there a while and if you show any skills at belly rubs, he will roll over so you can test your skills.

Later,
Lover of Basset Hounds,
Melissa

Like Totally Tubular, Man.....

We've actually had a winter this year with snow, storms and cold weather.

I am not a big fan of this.

Mild winters are happy!  Mild winters are sane!

Yesterday I was running around in a t shirt without a jacket.
Today, it is in the low 40's with wind to make it seem colder.  This winter does not want to go away.

Starting in January, when I realized that this winter was serious, I had to make a plan to keep my sanity.
I had to find activities to get me outside and actually enjoying the snow, instead of cursing it as I shoveled, shoveled and shoveled some more.  Seriously, at one point, I had to shovel paths in my backyard so the dogs could go outside.  The snow that fell around the middle of December and all of the snow that fell after did not leave my yard until this week!!!!  Three months of snow on the ground and a lot of it.

Snowshoeing was put on the agenda, including a full moon hike that went straight up a mountain and straight back down.

Then a LivingSocial deal showed up in my inbox......
2 hours of tubing at Soldier Hollow.

I seem to get one every year in late January.  :)  I've gone with the deal for the past three years.  The first year, the tracks were fast, not too fast and perfect.  Last year, there was very little snow and it was warm.  You would have to push off your tube 3 times to get down the hill.  This history lesson was to set up what occurred when I went this year.

I went up on February 27th.  It was cold and there had been fresh snow a couple of days before.  The tracks were packed down and ready to ride.

On the first ride up the tow line, I noticed a sign that I did not remember......

When you get to the cones, drag your feet to slow you down.

Ok... I took note and took off down the hill sitting in my tube.
Got to the cones and realized a problem, my feet really did not reach the ground.
I was flying!  Excessive speed was reached....
I met the safety fences.
And eventually stopped.

For the rest of the runs down the hill, I laid down on my belly on my tube and DUG my feet into the snow to stop before bonding with the safety fences again.

At one point, the staff drove a snowmobile up the runs with an attachment behind it to grind up the tracks to slow them down.  They were running that fast!!!

All in all it was a very fun day that made all of this snow bearable.

Being pulled up the hill!!! What a way to Tube.

 Still thawing out.
Melissa

The Great Crayon Massacre of 2013

Hi, my name is Melissa and I am addicted to Pinterest.

It started out simple enough with an invitation to join by my cousin 2 years ago at Thanksgiving.  I started slow with a couple of boards and a few pins.

And then,
it quickly went out of control.

Soon I was planning to build furniture, build an arbor, redo counter tops, outfit my friends and family or anyone who would let me for Halloween (seriously, I have over 50 costume ideas in my Holiday board), create the best workout ever from tips I found, and create amazing meals and desserts .

It stayed at the virtual level and planning for quite some time with only a few simple easy recipes making their ways into the real world.

Life was good.

Til that fateful day, when I stated, "I need to do more than just pin; I need to start doing these crafts and such....'

Little did I know what would happen next.

Gauze ghosts at Halloween
Subway Art printables at Christmas
A cake that took 4 HOURS to prepare (it's reallllllllly gooooood, but just beware)
A clean oven using ammonia
A wreath, including making my own frame for the base
Cleaning my toilet with Alka Seltzer
Cutting glass bottles with fire and nail polish remover
A crockpot that is begging for mercy from all of the recipes
and I could go on....

and then I saw it....
a Valentine's Day craft that was cute, not cheesy or overly gushy....
and thought, I can do that.

Here's the link to my pin....

martha, you done me wrong.

Yes, Martha Stewart is the blame for the great crayon massacre of 2013....

I read the directions, and tried to follow them, really I did, but my crayons, which I had purchased for this hare-brained idea would not shave in a sharpener.

So, I hacked them to death with my butcher knife.  That should of been an indicator to stop right there, but I forged on.  I proceeded to crimp, or so I thought, the edges of my wax paper and layered my precious crayon remnants between the craft paper and ever so lightly began to iron them to melt the wax.

Did you know that melted crayon wax can go thru wax paper and craft paper and completely leave your established work area in a heartbeat?
I do.

Once again, the universe was saying, "STOP", but did I listen,
No.

Attempt #2 included folding of the wax paper before crimping and leaving a 3 inch gap of empty space before the edge and multiple layers of craft paper and an iron turned WAY down.  I think my breath was probably hotter than the iron.

I got the crayons to melt, not in a pretty and even way like the photo for the directions, but in a weird streaky abstract sort of way.

I did not care.  I let them cool and cut them into hearts and hung them in my front window for the world to see.

6 hours of work, mostly in clean up

If you drive by my house before the end of February, take a look at the Pinterest addiction problem in my window, and warn your friends about the dangers of Pinterest........

I've gotta go,
I think some new pins have been added since the last time I was on.

Melissa

Reunited, and it feels soooo good....

                                                     glub...glub, glub........glub....  :)

My inner fish, alright technically a dolphin, is a happy camper!  I got back in the pool this past week!!!  I did laps.  I circle swam to share a lane with 3 other people.  I swam a mile, granted not a fast mile, but I swam a mile.

The moment my flip flops hit the pool deck, I realized how much I missed swimming.  How did I let almost a year go by without it?  Life got in a the way and other dreams and goals took precedent, that's how....

I started running last year and it took the majority of my focus and let's face it, exercise time.  As an adult, there is not an unlimited amount of time you have to workout.  There are other responsibilities and things that just need to get done that take the majority of your day.  Finding time to workout is a priority for me, but sometimes I have to choose one activity over another.  This year, my goal is to find a balance in between running and swimming for my cardio activities.  I actually have a plan, which I did not last year.

Now, let's get back to the pool, shall we?

I had no goal, no plans or times for my laps when I did my first introductory dip back in the pool.  I swam without pressure on myself,  only for the joy.  I think that's why I was able to do the mile.  I alternated between freestyle and breaststroke, with the majority in free, and just let myself swim.  I did a mantra from my meditation challenge to keep my mind quiet and to stay in the moment, not in how far I had swam or how far I needed to go.   I'm trying to keep this attitude in mind for all of my swims.

The past few years, both in and out of the pool, I have become interested in a swimming technique  called, 'Total Immersion'.  It teaches you to move in the most efficient way in the water, i.e., reduce drag, no wasted energy.  It reminds me of a moving meditation, everything has a reason and is, in my opinion, beautiful to watch.   Natural swimmers use a lot of the techniques Total Immersion teaches--they are long in the water and generally use less strokes to cover the same distance when compared to others.  If you are interested, you might want to check out their website.

One other thing, if your inner fish is screaming for you to get in the pool and you are worried about the damage that chlorine can do to your hair....
try this tip from another swimmer that I use, apply a little olive oil to your wet hair before you get in the pool.  While you are swimming your swim cap will keep it on your hair, and if any water gets on your hair from the pool, the olive oil acts as a barrier to the chlorine.  When you are done, just shampoo the olive oil out.  Hair protected and deep conditioned.  :)

Well, I've gotta run....
I've got a date with a lap lane at the pool.

Melissa

Blurred into Darkness....

In the middle of the night, on Thursday (actually Friday, because it was around 3 am), I got up for a routine reason.  A bathroom break and a sip of water.  I do not know about you, but I have a time of night that I get up almost every night for that.  Why is this blog worthy?  Normally, it's not, but what happened on that night turned out to be so.

My vision was blurry when I made my way through the darkness to the bathroom.

I have horrible eyesight.  That is no secret.  When my contacts are out and my glasses are not on, the big giant E on the vision testing board is a blur.  I honestly would not know that is an 'E' if not for the fact that the chart has not changed in all of my years of living.  A blurry trip to the bathroom in the middle of the night is not that uncommon, because I know the route I take,  I do not put my glasses on.  What made this night different?  I got into the bathroom and looked at something up close, it was still blurry.  As this occurred in the middle of the night, I didn't think too much about it.  I was half asleep and had been rubbing my eyes.  In my half asleep state, I put it in the back of my mind and went back to bed.

When my alarm went off a couple of hours later, I knew that my blurry vision at 3 am was an indicator of the massive migraine that now occupied my head.  If I had been more aware at 3 am, I would have taken my medication and been ok, but I had not, so at 6:45 I was in pain.  My vision was down to straight in front of me, my peripheral vision was gone.  I could not handle light, it made me nauseated.  Noise, like an alarm clock, was like a chainsaw on my nerve endings.  The next 36 hours were spent in an attempt to rid myself of these symptoms.  Sleep is elusive; the pain will not let you drop off into oblivion.  The medication that at 3 am would be so effective at 7am does not make a difference once the migraine has taken full effect.

This was not my first migraine, and unfortunately, I do not believe it will be my last.  Bummer.  Through out my years, I have learned about my migraines and their triggers.  I, somehow, manage to get both hereditary and environmental migraines.  Hereditary migraines have a family link, normally from father to daughter or mother to son.  Weird, huh?  Not all of the time, but according to the information my doctor gave me, it's true the majority of the time.  My dad gets migraines.  We both get them where our vision is affected.  It's not fun.  Environmental migraines are triggered by food, light, or something outside of the body.  I have issues with nuts, especially almonds and walnuts.  Flashing lights, like strobe lights, trigger them as well.  A certain tight muscle in my neck left untreated will trigger them as well.  I have spent a lot of time figuring out what causes my migraines, because I would do about anything to avoid one.  They just suck.

Since my mid-twenties, I have managed to learn my environmental triggers and my number of migraines has dropped dramatically.  Amazing progress and results, because for a time of my life, I was having way too many.  The frustrating thing about my migraines now is that when they happen I can not identify the trigger.  I posted about this one on facebook and got a couple of ideas, but none of them were it.

 (Guys turn away for a second....it's time for period talk)

One trigger of migraines, especially in women, is tied to their menstrual cycles.  Some women get them right before their period starts; others when certain hormone levels drop or rise.  Everyone is different, but this has never affected me.  There goes that trigger.....

(ok, guys, you can come back)

The reason for this post is two-fold...
Number 1, if you suffer from migraines, what are your triggers?  Any ideas for me?  I am willing to try just about anything.

and Number 2, if you don't suffer from them, Thank your lucky stars, but please also realize unlike a normal headache, a couple of advil will not solve the problem.

Feeling human again....
Melissa

A Drop in the Bucket....

You can mock, and you can laugh, but a few months ago,  I created a Bucket List...

Yes, a cheesy, cliched Bucket List.

"Why?", you may ask, well,  I'll tell ya why...

Life is a series of opportunities and decisions, both big and little, and if you have not taken the time to figure out what you really want out of life, you may miss a once in a lifetime opportunity that in hindsight you might regret.  Bucket Lists can help you avoid that.....

So, where is the controversy and mocking coming from?

In a nutshell, the internet.

The reason, I believe, that Bucket Lists have gotten such a bad rap is a majority of the items that are being put on lists that you can find on the internet are expensive.  Will your life be a failure if at the end of your life, because you were fiscally responsible and could not pay for a trip to China and as a result you did not stand on the Great Wall of China because it was on your list?  ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!  Items left on your list are not failures, in my opinion, but dreams not yet fulfilled.

My friends and I had been talking about things we want in life lately and my bucket list grew out of that.   A lot of my items have to do with travel, as it is something I LOVE TO DO!, but others will require nothing but love and time.

I am not going to post my entire list; for one thing, it has 106 items on it, but the main reason is I believe Bucket Lists are fairly personal.  My list is a representative of  my hopes and dreams for my life, not shallow thoughts.  If at the end of my life, I still have items on my list, I will be ok, because that means I am still a dreamer.  My list is also not complete.  I expect to add to it as my life continues.  Dreaming, both little and big, should never stop.

Here on my blog, you will see a few of them, as I discuss them and I will let you know when I attempt an item and how it goes.  Some of the ones I have already accomplished did not go so well, like learning to surf, but I am glad I at least had the courage to try.

This blog post came from an item I checked off yesterday--Take a Photography Class.  I found a groupon for an all day workshop for $35. 

bokeh effect on a plant

Why did I post this photo of a leaf?  I learned how to create this effect at the workshop.  I thought I needed a different lens with aperture settings not on the lenses I currently own.  If I had not created my Bucket List, I might of missed an amazing opportunity.  Bucket Lists rock!

The main thing I'm finding after creating my list, I am more aware of opportunities and in a weird way, there seems to be more of them presenting in my life.   Awareness is an amazing thing.

It took me almost a week to come up with my list.  I searched the net for lists that I liked and thought about things, experiences and service I wanted to have in my life.  While I won't be sharing my entire list, I will share a few to maybe help jumpstart yours and see that it does not have to cost a lot of money to be a Bucket List item.

                ----See the Northern Lights
                ----Watch the AFI 100 best movies
                ----Learn to say 'no' without feeling guilty
                ----Help someone fulfill a goal

I hope you still dream and dream BIG....
and from that, put it to paper and make a Bucket List or whatever you want to call it.

Melissa